To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. – Oscar Wilde
To my regular readers please don’t get worried. I have no resorted to writing erotica in order to get my ratings up, or pull in a few more readers. Mind you I did smile at the thought of the type of new readers I may pull in through this title.
As I have demonstrated in my posts this week, it is great to ask yourselves questions. So I want to start by asking you some questions. Read them, think about them, and answer them to yourself honestly.
Do you feel like you’re your worst critic? Do you find yourself criticizing your body, brainpower, dress sense, ability to do your job, your relationships, and just about anything about yourself?
Are you frequently putting yourself down? Beating yourself up mentally for things you do? Blaming yourself for all sorts of things?
Self-esteem is all about how much people value themselves, the pride they feel in themselves, and how worthwhile they feel. Self-esteem is important because feeling good about yourself can affect how you act. A person who has high self-esteem will make friends easily, is more in control of his or her behavior, and will enjoy life more. It can help you feel capable, strong, and in control of your life. Good self-esteem. and a positive attitude are a great combination for building a healthy lifestyle.
We spend so much of our time waiting to be loved, hoping love will find us, searching, yearning for that special love. Feeling empty and lost without it. Wanting someone to give us love and fill us up. Unfortunately, that’s not usually how life works. You will draw to you exactly what you create in life, and what you believe you are worthy of. So loving yourself can create love in your life.
Think about what you need to fill that emptiness inside, that place that is longing for love. What specifically do you need? Find the answer and then give it to yourself. No one is more capable of loving you, and giving you exactly what you need than you are! When you learn how to fulfill yourself in that way, you stop searching for it outside of yourself and you suddenly begin attracting it to you! You change yourself from a sponge to a magnet! People see you radiating self love and they are drawn to you!
Make the choice to love yourself. After all, who deserves it more? The more loving you are to yourself, the more loving you will be able to be to everyone around you. Family and friends will especially benefit from this. Make a choice to come from a place of love for yourself and for everyone who is important in your life.
Here are some tips how to make love to yourself:
1. Cut out your self criticism! Be aware of your self-talk. Stop putting yourself down. Many of us have very unkind inner critics. When we make an error, this critical voice inside our head turns on us, saying things like, “That was so stupid! … I can’t do anything right! … What a loser!” We need to replace these negative messages with other, more positive ones. With awareness, over time, you can catch yourself when your self-talk is negative, and change the message to something more positive and ego-enhancing. When you hear negative comments coming from within yourself, tell yourself to stop.
2. Stop negative thinking now! To many people think in a biased, negative way. They have negative views of themselves (e.g. `I’m no good’), the world (e.g. `Life has no meaning’) and the future (e.g. `I will always feel this way’). Thoughts like these can trap you in a vicious circle. The more stressed you become, the more negative thoughts you have, and the more you believe them. The more negative thoughts you have, and the more you believe them, the more stressed you become. It is like a leak in your confidence bucket – constantly drip-drip-dripping away your confidence and self esteem.
3. Forgive yourself! It’s true that you are not perfect, but neither is everybody else. It’s normal to make mistakes, so do yourself a favour by giving yourself forgiveness. Blaming yourself for mistakes doesn’t help and only causes more pain. When you learn how to forgive yourself for past mistakes you free yourself so you can move forward.
4. Accept things you can’t change! You will feel much better about yourself if you just accept the things you can’t change and move on. Just remember that you do what you can, the very best that you can, and that is all you can do.
5. Focus on your strengths! Recognise your strengths and build your life around them. Toss aside your weakness, concentrating on them will only bring you down, instead focus on your strengths. Start putting emphasis on your strength. Knowing and developing them is extremely important for our success and our happiness.
6. Write your success stories! Make a list of all of your achievements so far. You must learn to recognise your achievements. Celebrating them is extremely important to your continued success and progress. Take pride in your accomplishments. Share your achievements with others. Brag a little.
7. Praise yourself often! Criticism breaks your confidence. Praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. When you do something well, or when you find yourself saying the right things to yourself or to others, be sure to reward yourself, acknowledge yourself verbally, give yourself a pat on the back.
8. Fake it till you make it! Yet another way you can learn to love yourself is by being in the practice of using positive affirmations. Repeat those qualities daily, telling yourself that you are those things, already. Whether or not you currently believe it, say it anyway…, For example, take time to tell yourself, each day, “I am happy and successful” or “I am beautiful and bright” or “I love my body: I feel healthy and in balance” or “I am loving, caring, and worthy of love” or “I am powerful and self-confident”.
9. Take care of your body! Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need to have optimum energy and vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise can you enjoy? Cherish and revere the temple you live in. An important way to love yourself is to nourish and care for your body: eat healthy foods and exercise regularly.
10. LOVE YOURSELF – DO IT NOW! Don’t wait until you get well or lose the weight, or get the new job, or find the new relationship. Begin NOW – you are doing the best you can. After all you are reading my blog.
You are participating in the best, most productive type of DIY you can, personal development! Congratulations
Friendship with oneself is all important, because without it one cannot be friends with anyone else in the world. Eleanor Roosevelt