Don’t Point The Finger

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Don’t Point The Finger

You are surrounded by unlimited possibilities for success, happiness and achievement. Alas far too many people go through life doing the very best they can, but they never come within shouting distance of doing, having and being all that is possible for them. They settle for far less than they are truly capable of achieving.

For you to flourish, you must be flourishing as a person.

“Success is about who you become. The big challenge is to become all that you have the possibility of becoming. You cannot believe what it does to the human spirit to maximize your human potential and stretch yourself to the limit.” Jim Rohn

If your life is not flourishing, Personal Development is a vital key to you.

As is learning to take responsibility and control for everything you do, and everything that happens to you.

You must accept that you are the primary creative force in your own life, that you make your own decisions, and that everything that happens to you is a result of yourself and your own behaviours

When you feel that your life is controlled by other factors or people, by your job, your boss, your childhood experiences, your bills, your health, your family or anything else, you feel like a victim. You will feel like a pawn in the hands of fate. You feel helpless and unable to change or improve your situation.

You spend so much time blaming others and making excuses for your problems. The end result is most of the time you feel anger, frustration and failure, blaming non stop. This distorts your external reality and causes you to see things not the way they are, but the way you are. This way of thinking limits you.

You have to accept that you are at the cause for everything that happens to you and realize that you control everything that happens in your life.

“Whenever you point your finger, there are always three pointing back” Chris Howard

Stop saying things such as “I would have been successful if my partner hadn’t done that.” or “I would have a great relationship if my wife/husband would just…” There’s only one person you hurt by doing this. Only one that you are holding back. And that’s you!

Once you take responsibility, actual ownership of everything that happens in your life, you have the ability to control and change everything in your life. If you are pointing the finger at anyone but yourself you are giving yourself reasons and excuses as to why things aren’t happening for you.

You must take responsibility for everything that is happening to you! When you do, you are choosing to believe that, you can create everything in your life. So, from now on, you can choose to believe that it’s you that brings everything into your life for a reason. Don’t choose to point the finger elsewhere and give all your power away.

No longer allow yourself to say “it’s not my fault, I had no control over this”.

Instead ask “how did I cause this even at the most unconscious of levels?” What did I do to bring this into my life? What am I supposed to learn from this situation?

Be truly committed to living life full out. Be excited to do it and is embrace the whole journey. Remember nobody else is responsible for you. Start today to empower yourself to take charge in your life!

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p.s. Life Coaching can help you make the most of your  life. Life coaching will teach you highly effective ways to learn and implement the right thinking patterns. If you want life changing coaching email me for further details. I only deal with a few clients each month, and those I choose have to be truly ready to take action. If that’s you, contact me today at

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About the author: Larry Lewis
My name is Larry Lewis, Health & Wellness Life Coach, Founder of Healthy Lifestyles Living, contributor to the Huffington Post, recently featured in the Sunday Mail Newspaper and somebody who went from being an owner of a chain of gyms and fitness fanatic, to a visually impaired overweight and incredibly sick person. Read about my illness to wellness story.
  1. I don’t like saying the phrase like this you’ve mentioned, “it’s not my fault, I had no control over this”. Because I always try to find out the reason of the things that happen from time to time, and I’m ready to take the responsibility for all my actions

  2. Grady Pruitt says:

    Great post, Larry!

    I learned with my serving job a long time ago to start looking at the things that went wrong with a table when I had bad tips. What I noticed is that when I did an honest evaluation, yes there were things that happened beyond my control from time to time, but at least 90% of the things that could have been better on a given table was under my direct control and was because of something that I didn’t do (or in some cases, something I did).

    It took me a long time to start applying this same evaluation to other parts of my life, but as I’m starting to do so, I’m seeing very similar results. Yes, there are things that are beyond my control, but the vast majority of problems in my life are things I have control over and as I exercise that control, things are becoming more in line with the things that I desire.

    Thanks for sharing!

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