Why am I such a Jerk?

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Why am I such a Jerk?

So how great are the questions you ask yourself every day? It is so common for people’s self talk to put themselves down. Why do I keep messing things up? Why can I never keep hold of a job? Why me? Why can’t I ever get a break? If you hear yourself asking this type of question of yourself, I can guarantee you that you will be able to power up your day by asking yourself far better, more positive, empowering questions.

Disempowering questions stop you experiencing your real power and even prevent you from discovering your true ability. They stop you growing emotionally, financially and in your relationships

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing.  One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality.  ~ Albert Einstein

You have a power at your disposal every moment of the day. At any moment, the questions that we ask ourselves can shape our perception of who we are, what we’re capable of, and what we’re willing to do to achieve our dreams.

Questions can move your focus in a positive direction. They can create a frame of mind that is empowering and motivating.

Questions that cause us to focus on possibilities and solutions are the ones that empower us. By constantly asking empowering questions of ourselves, regardless of our circumstances, we will direct our minds to continually focus on new possibilities and solutions. This type of focus enhances your personal growth and development.

As human beings we can only focus on a limited number of things at any given time. We can use this fact to our advantage, because when we focus on empowering things it becomes literally impossible to focus on limiting things at the same time. This means that when we focus on something positive, really focus on it, our minds will delete or block out negative thoughts.

Because questions have the ability to change our focus, we can automatically change our feelings as well. When you ask yourself, “what do I feel really great about right now?” Your mind becomes occupied with answering that question; it simply cannot search for reasons to feel lousy at the same time.

Being truly focused, involves more than just our mental acuity, it also involves our emotions. This is especially true because the questions we are asking ourselves often have to do with how we feel about something. Emotions are the power plant of human motivation. We can use our minds to ask the questions that will harness that power, and focus it in the direction we want to go.

Learning to consciously control the questions you ask will take you further to achieving your ultimate destiny than almost anything.

There are no foolish questions, and no man becomes a fool until he has stopped asking questions.  ~ Charles Proteus Steinmetz

The right questions will empower you. Questions can immediately change your state and give you access to resources and solutions.

Every morning when you wake up, you ask yourselves questions. When the alarm goes off, what question do you ask yourself? Maybe, ‘How come I have to get up right now?’ ‘What if I hit the snooze button just one more time?’. As you get washed, ‘Why do I have to go into work today?’ and ‘How bad is the traffic going to be today?’ As you start of on your journey ‘What kind of stuff is going to be dumped on me today?’

You must consciously start every day asking questions that will put you in the right frame of mind, excited about life. This will effect how you feel about virtually everything.

Let me provide you with some awesome, empowering questions

  • If I could wave a magic wand and have whatever I wished for in any part of my life, what would it be?
  • If I could design my perfect lifestyle, day in and day out, what would it look like?
  • If I could create my perfect calendar, how would I spend each day, each week, each month, and each year?
  • How would I change my life if I received £1 million cash, tax free, today? What is the first thing I would do?
  • What parts of my work do I enjoy the most and do the best? Where do I excel? What sorts of activities make me the happiest?
  • What would I do, how would I spend my time, if I learned today that i had only six months left to live?

My final question, that maybe you could answer in my comments section is “What one great thing would I dare to dream if I knew I could not fail? If I were absolutely guaranteed success in any one goal, small or large, short term or long term, what would it be?”

By changing the questions you ask when managing your life, you will immediately change your focus, gain access to new resources within yourself, and produce a better quality result.

The one real object of education is to have a man in the condition of continually asking questions.  ~Bishop Mandell Creighton

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About the author: Larry Lewis
My name is Larry Lewis, Health & Wellness Life Coach, Founder of Healthy Lifestyles Living, contributor to the Huffington Post, recently featured in the Sunday Mail Newspaper and somebody who went from being an owner of a chain of gyms and fitness fanatic, to a visually impaired overweight and incredibly sick person. Read about my illness to wellness story.
23 Comments
  1. charlie nitric May 23, 2011 at 11:23 pm

    Hello Larry –

    My parents used to tell me I drove them crazy with questions. My older sisters said the same thing about me when I was younger. When I write a story and sometimes when I comment, my mind races far off into the future. It tangents and as I answer one question in my mind….it leads me to 10 more unanswered questions. Amazing huh and excellent post. 🙂

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:27 pm

      Charlie – why does it not surprise me that your mind races off, just reading your incredible stories shows us that, and it creates the most amazing stories. So you keep asking yourself all those questions because they are producing an amazing blogger and person

  2. Bongo May 24, 2011 at 12:18 am

    Ohhhhhhhhhhh my friend…..at the questions I have goin on in my head…..wanna visit????? warning ..it gets a little crowded in there…LOLOL… nice post…As always…XOXOXO

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:25 pm

      Bongo – store these questions for another time. I know the battle you fight, and i watch and would move heaven and earth to help, you are so courageous and will make the final breakthrough, then what i write will be of help. I know this deep down. Love you girl

  3. Savira Gipta May 24, 2011 at 2:09 am

    I love questions… I still question but I have changed the way I ask or put them…..I no longer direct them personally to the self… I direct them in a constructive way “How can I” “Is there another way”…..
    My answer to your question: My dream….. would be to accomplish my trip that got postponed! If could help everyone find their true self… the beauty that lies within them…..this would be my goal

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:23 pm

      Savira – as always i love your comments. I pray that you get to go on that trip some day soon. You, yes you, were the one to help me start to find my true self as a blogger, and i will be for ever grateful. So chalk me up as one of your successes, and i have no doubt you have done that for many others and will continue to do so x

  4. Stuart Nager May 24, 2011 at 2:17 am

    I also drive people with questions. I often ask ‘why”, so I can understand where someone is coming from, why they are doing that or this, etc. I believe in inquiry.

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:20 pm

      Stuart – my daughter was once the best questioner i’ve met, and she could ask the question why 100 times in an hour – thank you for bringing me that memory flooding back, i’m laughing all over again. Please don’t ask me ‘why’.

  5. Jessica Mokrzycki May 24, 2011 at 2:25 am

    Great post! I enjoyed reading it…I liked your suggested questions. Very positive.

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:19 pm

      Jessica – to red those words from you is praise indeed. Thank you.

  6. Corinne Rodrigues May 24, 2011 at 9:23 am

    Larry – I used to ask myself the dis-empowering questions and they truly stopped me from growing….You’ve started us off on some wonderful questions – I’m going to work on them.

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:18 pm

      Corinne – as always thank you for your comments, all of us influenced by personal development should on a regular basis revisit thee questions, and make sure we are retaining our passion and motivation, keeping on the right road

  7. sancheeta biswas May 24, 2011 at 10:25 am

    Larry, questions always keep coming and going, it even comes in my dreams without rest. your post was answers to many of my questions, need to know more……restless mind is sure to visit you again.

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:17 pm

      Sancheeta – you are always welcome to come visit my blog, put your feet up, relax and hopefully find some answers

  8. Jessica Brant May 24, 2011 at 10:39 am

    Larry,
    My positive thinking Fairy Life Coach you have waved your magic wand over my head sprinkled it you pixie dust I am now thinking positive thoughts from here on out…. In the morning when I wake I will begin by say I will have the most productive teleconference ever, things will be seen clearly and a path will be made….. You figure out the rest. And POOF I am gone….
    xoxo
    Jess

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:16 pm

      Jessica – thank you so much for my new image – i am now going to be known as the ‘Fairy Life Coach’. Would have much preferred if i was Peter Pan and you were Tinkerbell

  9. Roy Durham May 24, 2011 at 1:12 pm

    i thing we were on the same wave link this morning here is another link to add to your list http://youtu.be/d-diB65scQU be happy thanh you and god bless

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:13 pm

      Roy – Welcome to Healthy Lifestyles Living Blog – love what you’re doing over at yours by the way

  10. Mary May 25, 2011 at 1:50 pm

    Great post Larry! Makes one really think throughout their day and as I am starting mine, I will be recalling your words as I go my merry way 🙂

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:12 pm

      Mary – If my words stimulate and provoke positive thoughts that excite you and enhance your happiness then i am one happy blogger. (that was till i just read strawberry delight mmmmm)

  11. Nelieta May 25, 2011 at 2:21 pm

    Hi Larry, great and powering post! We should never stop asking questions. I will take some quiet time and answer the questions..it will be interesting to see what my answers are 🙂

    • LarryLewis May 25, 2011 at 10:10 pm

      Nelieta – Thank you for your kind words. I hope the answers you find motivate you, and help you continue to move on with passion to the achievement of your goals

  12. zachary May 2, 2012 at 3:13 am

    “What one great thing would I dare to dream if I knew I could not fail? If I were absolutely guaranteed success in any one goal, small or large, short term or long term, what would it be?”

    I wouldn’t search for “Why am I such a jerk?” I would stop hurting the people I love the most and wish to keep around. I would stop chasing those people away. I would always make them smile, laugh, and feel comfortable. I wouldn’t chase them away, but they would chase me down, because they love me so much. I would stop regretting “I did it again.” I would stand in awe, gratitude, and tears of happiness, because I have changed so much, instead.

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