There is something to be said about living where you have been brought up and where your relatives, such as, parents, sisters and brothers, cousins, aunts and uncles, are just around the corner that you can take the time to visit them when you feel the need. It also represents your roots. You never forget your roots, right?
Well, I know there are those that can never forget theirs. They may try to make a life somewhere new, stay for a while, decide its not exactly the life they thought it would be, constantly looking longingly at the life they left behind, not giving their new life a chance, and end up leaving, returning to their roots. When you move it feels like you’re starting all over again. You have to learn new streets, new faces, and new ways of doing things. People may dress or speak differently. The slang and accents may sound different in your new community, depending on how far you move. It’s natural for people to feel out of place in a new situation where they don’t know the customs and rules.
Experts consider moving to be one of the major stresses in life. Leaving behind friends, familiar places, and activities creates anxiety for everyone involved. A move can lead some people to become depressed, they can’t shake feelings of sadness or anxiety. Many people usually feel better once they’ve had time to settle in, but not all. Some people just can never adapt.
It would be unnatural if you did not look back sometimes and think about the life you left behind, there will be many things you will miss, there will be good and bad, things that you are lucky enough to have, and things that you no longer have. Maybe you will miss your friends that you left behind, but then new friendships can be made.
Relocating can bring with it feelings of loss that often hold people back from fully entering into and enjoying life in a new location. Anger also is an emotion that comes into play because they miss what they left behind and their lives aren’t the way they want them to be. They do not allow themselves to move on.
When you allow the life you left behind to pull on you constantly, eventually it will cause you to throw the towel in and head back to your old home.
In my life I have lived in many different places – I wouldn’t have enjoyed things half as much as I have if I’d only lived in one place. I love the excitement of new cultures, new accents, new people and new challenges. My motto is where I leave my hat is my home. I also make friends easy, so moving around has never caused hardships for me personally.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.” Mark Twain
At the end of the day, for a relocation to be successful, there’s only one person that needs to be happy, and that’s you. There’s only one person responsible for making it happen, too, and that’s also you. The memories of family and your previous life will never really go away entirely. And, the old saying is true–absence makes the heart grow fonder–especially when you are away from family.
Of course every major life transition is difficult. Relocation always involves some degree of loss which needs to be worked through as part of the moving and settling in process. It takes time. Of course it’s difficult to move away from your familiar environment, leave a job, friends and family, the home we have known for some time and so on. Your emotional wellbeing depends on settling in, and allowing yourself to make a new life.
What happens if you can never truly settle down, and your health and mind suffer. You can’t compromise your happiness for ever. Life is too short to be miserable and if you feel it is better for you and healthier for you to go home then that is what you must do. When you get to the point that you know you will never be happy you have to go home, figure out what you really need & want, feel better about your life. But never forget you are doing this for you, and you have to consider what’s best for others around you, and make the right decision for all of you.
So my question is – would you be prepared to leave your roots and some of your family to live in another land knowing that you perhaps wouldn’t be able to go back for financial or other reasons. What would make you do it – and what do you think you would miss most about “home” wherever that is?