Transforming The Victim Mentality

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Transforming The Victim Mentality

A victim mentality is a big limitation to people trying to get up and move on after personal crisis. The most destructive words they constantly say within their minds is “Why me?” A victim is someone who feels powerless, and is therefore unable to take appropriate action to resolve situations adversely affecting their well-being.

Are you seeing yourself as a victim?

To complain is always non acceptance of what is. It invariably carries an unconscious negative charge. When you complain, you make yourself into a victim. When you speak out, you are in your power. So change the situation by taking action or by speaking out if necessary or possible; leave the situation or accept it. All else is madness. Eckhart Tolle

Everyone faces tragedies, trials, and obstacles in life. That’s just part of life. No one ever said life was going to be easy. And the fact is, life’s difficulties are often opportunities where we can learn and grow the most.

The way you choose to respond to life’s tragedies will determine whether you develop the attitude of a victor or a victim. You can choose to think and behave in a productive manner, even when you feel pain and sorrow or let it get the better of you, destroying your present and future.

The victim mentality causes you to feel weak and therefore give up and giving in to external pressures. This attitude comes from within not without. As long as you perceive yourself as powerless, worthless, weak, and this makes you feel insecure, doubtful and hesitant, you will not be successful  in meeting life’s challenges.

So often, people waste time feeling sorry for themselves when they encounter a problem. They spend so much of their precious time complaining to others about how bad things are or they sit around and dwell on their negative emotions. Each second they waste complaining and wallowing is a second that they could have spent trying to improve their situation.

I’m no quitter, are you? It’s natural after suffering from a personal crisis to feel you are a victim to circumstances. For a while you will struggle letting things get to you. I should know. When I first lost total vision in my eye I allowed it to push me into a negative spiral.

The first step in transforming the victim mentality is to take control over your thoughts and emotions. You can always choose your attitude. Choosing to go through life with a positive attitude and a desire to be a victor rather than a victim. No matter how bad things are, you always have choices. You can choose to get back up when life pushes you down, or you can choose to allow it to destroy you. .

I lost almost all my vision in one eye and at first I felt like a victim, but I have taken my power back & learned as much as I can about the support available to me and have refocused to concentrate on my internal vision. I may not be able to see well through my eyes, or the remaining one, but I could create a vision in my inner mind of the life I wanted to build.

I found myself struggling with so many normal standard activities. I’d never been prepared for living life through just one eye. I never realised how difficult it would be. For a while I let it get the better of me. There have been many negative consequences of this. I had allowed my body to decay and wrinkle, now there was far more fat than muscle. My health had deteriorated beyond belief, becoming a major concern. The reason for it happening was simple, I allowed it to. I fell into the victim mentality, my vision loss was beating me down and I wasn’t prepared to fight back.

The turning point came on the 26th December, 2014. Lying in bed I went through a period of thought. A multitude of negative feeling erupted inside of me. I was lost, felt on edge, seeing my situation as being the beginning of the end for me. I felt exhausted. Sadness took over. I knew I was now a victim to my vision loss and totally lost sight not only externally but internally too. I could see no future. Everything I had worked towards now seemed impossible.

For 5 minutes I felt myself sinking further and further down. Then I sat up and said ‘No more, this isn’t me, I can get through this.’ My mind immediately changed and from that moment forward my life began to transform.

I refused to allow my loss of vision to define me, instead I chose to make it a defining moment and began taking positive proactive action towards what I wanted!

I may have limitations but I am not a victim. Nor do you have to be!

Don’t waste time regretting what has been or blaming what is. Get yourself out of the mindset that tells you that life is unfair and that there is nothing you can do to change things.  Life is meant to be lived, no matter what circumstances you encounter, so get living. Make a conscious choice to live a life that’s worth living, it all rests in the decision you make, so make the decision to get on and make your life great. .

Make a commitment to face all your fears. Let today be the day you stop being a victim to your circumstances and start taking action towards building the life you want. Break free from the toxic victim mentality and embrace your greatness. You were not meant for a mundane or mediocre life, nor were you destined to be a victim. Now it’s time for you to use your personal power and become a victor.

If it’s never our fault, we can’t take responsibility for it. If we can’t take responsibility for it, we’ll always be its victim. Richard Bach

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About the author: Larry Lewis
My name is Larry Lewis, Health & Wellness Life Coach, Founder of Healthy Lifestyles Living, contributor to the Huffington Post, recently featured in the Sunday Mail Newspaper and somebody who went from being an owner of a chain of gyms and fitness fanatic, to a visually impaired overweight and incredibly sick person. Read about my illness to wellness story.