Have you ever been aware of how one minute you have been feeling fantastic, then all of a sudden, some little thing pushes you right over the edge? It’s amazing how quickly a person’s mood can go from great to negative.
It is quite bewildering what some people get their knickers in a twist about. They have enough important things to deal with that brings stress to their daily lives but they allow the littlest of things push them over the edge.
So often they just simply make mountains out of the smallest of molehills. I love these sayings. They have no control, and just go with a knee jerk reaction to things which are really quite meaningless to the big picture of their life.
“Don’t Stress the Small Stuff–and it’s all small stuff.” Richard Carlson
Silly little things happen, and suddenly a feeling of uneasiness like a strange stirring within yourself starts up, a feeling you just can’t ignore. These little things can just push you to lose all reason and sensibility. You explode!
Life constantly throws out small tests. Too often we fail these tests by letting the little stuff get us down. We are really good at making little things become big things. When we experience frequent trivial, but upsetting events we move our systems into a state of perpetual stress.
Day in and day out little trivial annoying things happen to us –you drop some papers, take a wrong turn, get a parking ticket, get cut up in traffic, get stuck in traffic, lose your keys or some papers, spill a coffee or lose your mobile phone connection, worse still your internet connection goes down, your sports team loses, – and you have a melt-down. In our busy and over-scheduled lives, little events have become big events. And when already stressed, a truly large event now becomes completely unmanageable.
“Learning to stop sweating the small stuff involves deciding what things to engage in and what things to ignore. From a certain perspective, life can be described as a series of mistakes, one right after another with a little space in between.” Richard Carlson
If something this small throws you off, overreacting to a trivial thing, how are you going to react to a real problem in life. We must learn to manage our emotional responses to all types of events – to know what is important and what is only trivial – to stay healthy and sane.
When we give time, energy, and undo attention to trivial things we lose sight of important things and just build up our levels of stress.
Here’s a better way to handle this type of situation:
Break your old habits. – The impulse to react, rather than respond, is very real. A reaction takes little if any conscious effort. Whereas creating an authentic response takes time and energy. You need to learn to think for yourself, rather than just repeat your previous actions
It is far better to respond rather than react.- Responding to an event means taking some time to think about it and then making an intelligent choice about what to do next. Reactions are unconscious, there’s little or no real thinking involved. It is so much healthier to respond than react. A response is conscious rather than just an unconscious knee-jerk repetition. A response shows thoughtfulness, it uses your intelligence to consider how best to respond.
Take the time to think. – choose your best course of action, decide coolly rather than react emotionally. Then you can respond appropriately by creating your response. Take 5 seconds and some deep breaths.
Ask yourself these questions. –
- Is this just a distraction and I should laugh it off?
- Will this affect my life significantly?
- Is this truly serious and worth my full attention
It feels great to know that you are in charge of your feelings and responses instead of letting knee jerk reactions just happen to the tiniest of event.
“When you respond to life, that’s positive; when you react to life, that’s negative.” Zig Ziglar
You really don’t have to be a slave to the trivial things that happen in life. Only you can control how you react or respond. Remember, most trivial problem are like a snowflakes, they’re going to melt away in seconds. Are you going to let one tiny snowflake push you over the edge?
‘So what do you think? Please share your thoughts in the comments section, I’d love to hear from you!‘
P.S. If you have a second, sharing this article with your twitter followers would be a huge help.
Score Your Way To Good Health - With Our Healthy Lifestyle Plan
Score your way to good health with our healthy lifestyle plan and it's unique 70 point weekly scorecard!
Yes, it DOES feel great to know that I’m in charge of my thoughts, and my responses. My emotions give me instant guidance…if I’m feeling negative emotion (e.g. anger, frustration) I know it’s time to stop and check what I was thinking…then it’s easier to look for a thought that feels better, and move myself into a more loving and giving place before I respond to anything.
Another great post, Larry!
P.S. Love the quotes, too 🙂
BEC thank you once again for your kind words. You have mentioned something crucially important here. If we allow ourselves to feel, to notice our emotions, they can always give us an indication of where we are, enabling us to re programme so that we can fill ourselves with both positive thoughts and emotions, so much more empowering
I woke up this morning feeling that frustration of how slow something is moving.. I read your post and began to breath. I am impatient by nature… And when something like this happens my breath begins to remind me why I am at this cross road…to learn to be patient!
Some things are just not in my hands so I have to learn on letting go….
Savira – it was you that taught me to be myself, let me confirm what you already know that my father taught me, we are learning every day, life is about exploring and developing, as long as we show the interest in ourselves and are willing to discover our strengths and weaknesses
HA! I haven’t heard the work “knickers” in a while 😛
Yesterday was supposed to be a horrible day for me… I mean horrible! You ask why? Well long story short and I am sure you know what I mean when I say “my summer”, anyways it was the 1 year anniversary. So I woke up thinking that everyone was better off staying outta my way.
But surprisingly my day was actually awesome, I almost want to say it was the best day I’ve had in a week or so. I accomplished a lot and the biggest was getting through the day without crying for hours. I even managed to write a poem (and I haven’t written a poem in ages) and it actually turned out pretty good. LOL
Well now that I’ve told you my life story, my point is that even thou I was determined that my day was going to be horrible,it wasn’t.
I think a lot had to do with what you are talking about in your post. I immediately thought of what day it was, and how it should effect me but I busied myself with other things to occupy my mind.
Odd thing was I found myself cheering up others, making others laugh. It made me happy to see others happy and hey I got to play a role in making someone else smile 🙂 I continued spreading happy stuff from my phone on twitter until about 2 am … weird huh?
Thanks Larry and errm sorry for the book on your wall 😛
Ps. I tweeted, stumbled, dug, and FB shared
LOVE THIS Debbie, Not only have you given us an insight into the mind of Debbie, you have also shown us how we can turn any situation around. When there are things that really do trouble us, we can find a way to distract ourselves, take our mind away from those thoughts, so to make it possible to empower ourselves, and actually create wonderful things. You turned a potentially bad day into something far more constructive and desirable. Well done.
you help me get back myself to what I was..and today I have made a promise to myself,no matter what..I am going to be MYSELF..no more self pity..love u Larry..
Alpana – who you are, is a wonderful, talented lady, with a life full of dreams ahead of her. Rember the pot of gold awaits you at the end of the rainbow. Enjoy the journey, be proud of who and what you are, and yes let go of your self pity.
Good advice — thank you for another inspiring pep talk 😉
Linda – keep coming back, because i promise the pep talks will never stop.
Life is simply far to short to get your knickers in a twist over most things 😉
Charles – over most things you say, so what in particular do you get your knickers twisted by, maybe i dont actually want to know that answer.
On the other hand, getting into a Yoga Twist [and other stretches] can help you to unwind and let go!
kalpana although i’m not the Yoga sort i certainly know that it is a great way to unwind and relax. Never heard anything said negative about it by anyone that has participated in Yoga