Let Go Of Resentment

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Let Go Of Resentment

Are you burdened down by life? Feeling as though you are carrying a heavy load around with you. Fighting a lack of energy on a daily basis. Always suffering from one or other physical complaint, such as headaches, backaches, aches and pains and frequent colds.

Do you feel ‘run down’ so that you keep getting ill?

Do you feel tired and lacking in vitality

Do you tend to get low and depressed?

Do you find it difficult to appreciate the positive things in your life?

Do joy and happiness elude you?

Do you suffer from lack of confidence?

Does anxiety make it difficulty for you to feel intimate with others?

Are you isolated and lonely, or resentful and bitter?

Do you feel out of touch with your path in life?

The body expresses what the mind represses. Tim Lawrence

What is your mind and body telling you? What is dragging your life force down?

You have a lot of negativity stored up inside of yourself. You have issues that our frustrating you, limiting you, and probably keeping you in conflict.

Maybe you are storing up resentment to people who you feel have harmed you in someway.

• The boss who won’t promote you or give you a pay rise

• The lover that left you

• The school teacher who seemed to single you out as a kid

• Your parent who was too controlling, smothering or abandoning

• The business partner that put you in financial turmoil

A wise man once said, “Resentment is a poison one takes hoping to harm another.”

Resentment is the incapacity to forgive, for which you pay a heavy price. Investing your emotional energy in past events prevents you from living fully in the moment. It drains your life force. It will consume you if you let it. It will devour your life and everything you’ve ever dreamed life could be.

Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die. Malachy McCourt

Long-held resentment can lead to physical symptoms as well; muscle tension, migraines, high blood pressure, poor concentration, sleep and appetite disturbances, and a surpressed immune system, to name a few.

You need to release that resentment out of your physical body and mind. Repeating negativity over and over in your mind is not good for you and it will eventually bring about disease that usually manifests in a physical way.

Ask yourself these empowering questions: “Am I willing to give away more of my life to the person who offended me? Do they really deserve all this energy and attention? Do I choose to give them more of my thoughts, energy, passion and focus? What am I taking away from those I love by holding on to this grudge? Who am I really ‘making pay’ for my anger?”

Resentment always hurts you more than it does the person you resent. While this other person has probably forgotten you and what they did to you and gone on with their life, you continue to stew in your pain, perpetuating the past.

Those who have hurt you in the past cannot continue to hurt you now unless you hold on to the pain through resentment. Your past is past. Nothing will change it. You are hurting yourself with your bitterness. For your own sake, I challenge you to learn from it, and then let it go.

“To worry yourself to death with resentment would be a foolish, and senseless thing to do.” (Job 5:2)

As your spirit lifts, your mood changes and your outlook becomes more positive. In reframing your attitude to your life circumstances you can rediscover the personal meaning of your life and reconnect with contentment and joy.

Once we begin to focus on the good in life instead of hanging on to the challenges, we will find that beauty, life, love, and peace become the dominant experiences in our lives.

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About the author: Larry Lewis
My name is Larry Lewis, Health & Wellness Life Coach, Founder of Healthy Lifestyles Living, contributor to the Huffington Post, recently featured in the Sunday Mail Newspaper and somebody who went from being an owner of a chain of gyms and fitness fanatic, to a visually impaired overweight and incredibly sick person. Read about my illness to wellness story.
6 Comments
  1. Bec Owen July 13, 2011 at 4:01 pm

    Yes, it is a good idea to focus on the good things in life…I’ve found the easiest way to do that is: one step at a time. When we feel resentment, we can’t just jump straight to joy, because it’s too big a jump. But we can move ourselves there gradually, by reaching for a thought that feels a little better, then reaching for another thought that feels a little better, and so on.

    Great post, Larry!

    • LarryLewis July 14, 2011 at 6:09 pm

      Thank you Bec. Great share. It is best to take small steps rather than try and bite off more than you chew as the saying goes. Life is challenging, and to change some habits will take time. Making small gradual changes gives most people the best chance. You can’t chnge habits in a day, but working on them a little constantly will enable you to make the changes and stick with them

  2. Jessica Mokrzycki July 13, 2011 at 9:50 pm

    A great post! While resentment can be a destructive force in our lives, I have found reconciliation to be it’s antithesis…bringing restoration to relationships and healing.

    • LarryLewis July 14, 2011 at 6:03 pm

      Jessica – a totally awesome comment. We both know that the difference between holding resentment within you, and forgiveness is a life full of joy and calm, against stress and anxiety. One gives us a journey of great health and vitality the other takes us through a rocky road, and constant bouts of ill health. Yet to persuade others just to relese these feelings, to believe in its healing properties is one of the hardest things to do. ‘Why should I forgive them?’. Well, because you suffer my not, and benefit by doing so.

  3. sancheeta biswas July 14, 2011 at 9:21 am

    “guilt is anger directed at ourselves – at what we did or did not do. Resentment is anger directed at others – at what they did or did not do.”…..Peter McWilliams
    resentment effects our stability and balance of a peaceful mind. but if we think a step forward and be wise to forgive and forget, we can make our life go smoother, lighter and filled with happiness. though it is not that easy but we all need to lead a life with harmony and without regrets of being in pain and causing pain. so we must infuse into positive vibes rather than resentment.

    • LarryLewis July 14, 2011 at 5:54 pm

      Sancheeta – brilliantly said. It is for many so hard to forgive and forget, so much pain, so many memories that are so hard for them to let go, only if they could understnd gow much damage these feelings and thoughts do for them, and how life would just improve if they could just let it all go, and move on.

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